It seems like nowadays trends are changing faster than the speed of light. There’s fashion
trends, hair trends, food trends, music trends, and so much more. You might find yourself
struggling to keep up. If you are, it is crucial to remember that it’s probably all your fault and
you’re just not trying hard enough.
It’s also important to remember, most people aren’t trend-setters, so you’ll most likely need to be
a trend-follower. (Sorry, I don’t make the rules.) There’s no shame in it. In fact, you could take
pride in your ability to follow the hottest, latest trends. It’s just extremely important to remember
keeping up with them. If you’re doing it right, it should take up most of your free time. In reality, if
you’re tremendously stressed just thinking about it, it probably means you’re right on track. But,
that is beside the point. Who cares if you’re studying trends instead of taking a well-earned
break after a hard day’s work? Do you want to embarrass yourself in public? These are the
questions you have to ask yourself in moments of weakness.
This is the most important guiding principle in life: Individuality is for losers. Why would you do
what you want, when you could follow what everyone else is doing? This seems like a
no-brainer to me, folks. It should be for you too. At the end of the day, it’s just easier to fit in.
Following trends guarantees a giant pool of friends (probably). It also ensures that you leave
your house with the pride and satisfaction of knowing that there is nothing special or unique
about you. (You can pat yourself on the back for being the anti-hipster.)
So now that you’re stressed, exhausted, and conformed to every frequently changing trend,
don’t you feel better. DON’T YOU? I’m still waiting for my contentment to kick in. I’m sure it
will… Any minute now… Please, help.