Humor is.
Please note: This piece is satire.
It MIGHT suck that women generally have their voices disregarded, have to deal with income
disparity, and some other boring issues. But what really gets under my skin are all the feminists
complaining. It’s just like, lighten up already! Before anyone starts saying something ‘sensible’,
like, you have to bring attention to a problem in order to fix it… well boo, freaking hoo! Nobody’s
gonna take you seriously if you’re being too serious, right?
The more I’ve thought about it, the more I’ve realized that the issues surrounding feminism
would easily dissolve if feminists just learned to have a sense of humor. That would definitely
solve all gender equality issues. But we all know that women don’t get jokes! That is an example
of a brilliant joke that would probably dismay a feminist. All is fair in comedy and humor – that’s
how the saying goes, right?
So just smile, in a rather senseless fashion. I know some of you might be shaking your head at
this point, but would it really hurt you to laugh once in a while. I mean what’s the point of living if
you can’t. So what if you get paid less for the same amount of effort as a man in your position?
Your true value lies in your ability to look pleasant, even in the face of disparity! Also (not in a
sexist way at all) it does make you look more pretty and approachable! Nobody wants a grumpy
looking female coworker.
As I said, you’re not taken seriously until you stop taking yourself too seriously. That’s especially
true for women. You don’t want to give into the preconceived notion that women don’t have a
sense of humor. It’s better to just laugh through the pain and live your life subverting negative
stereotypes, all the while suppressing your true thoughts. This is the way every woman should
live. One might say that strides for change do not occur through jokes and (fake) laughter. But
the most important thing to remember is that a happy life is more important than living an
unhappy one.
Remember, feminists never smile. At a certain point, the muscles in their faces
atrophy and they are physically unable to. Do you want a good life? Don’t be a feminist. If there
were no feminists there would be no one trying to change the systemic oppression of women.
Which is nice and all, but I like my face muscles.
GREAT TIP:
If you don’t think your fake smile/laugh is convincing, then practice in front of a mirror. In a
matter of time, you’ll look like a natural. Who knows, maybe one day it will be natural. 🙂
Need practice laughing? Check out a show at Stand Up NY!