Bored? Here Are 5 Cool Websites To Change That!

Bored???

Hey Are You Bored? Ya Well I Thought So!

Feel bored no more with the Blob! Fooling around with the blob is a fun pass time. Mess around with a silly googly eyed slimeball and fling him around or giggle him or do whatever just keep me out of it. http://andrew.wang-hoyer.com/experiments/blob/ 

Do you have extra money to burn? Do you fantasize blowing money away on worthless things to distract you? Or maybe you just want to find some really cool stuff you never knew you needed? Check out https://www.thisiswhyimbroke.com/new/

TIWIB
TIWIB

Want to watch TV. Okay that was a dumb question, of course you do! If you crave the Saturday morning cartoons of the 1980s or the infomercials, movie trailers and advertisements? The cool thing about http://my80stv.com/ is that you can customize what you want to watch.

My 80s TV
My 80s TV

Want to look like a freakin hacker from your favorite movies? Don’t know coding? Perfect! On http://geektyper.com/ you can look like a malicious terrorist and freak people out? You won’t be bored in prison.

hacking?
hacking?

Now the last website I would suggest is http://mrdoob.com/ it has a large collection of awesome things to fool around with from endless error messages to trippy 3D shapes and much more. If you are stuck in class I would highly recommend… that you quit this tab and take notes. *wink wink*

 

 

Mr Doob
Mr Doob

 

(Actually take notes though)

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Szechuan Sauce! Rick and Morty Season 3 Is Almost Here!!!

Rick and Morty Season Three Is Coming Sooner Than You Think!

Rick and Morty is one of the most clever animated television series. Justin Roiland and Dan Harmon are the two brilliant creators of the show, along with their amazing team of writers and animators.

Every Episode Rick and Morty has only been getting crazier and funnier than the last and fans are loving it! The second season of the series left a lot of questions to be answered, but the first episode of season three brings a more urgent enigma.

Rick at McDonalds
Rick at McDonalds

On April first the first episode of Rick and Morty’s third season aired on adult swim for the entire day. Fans were ecstatic and talk about the new season became the new hot topic. One of the biggest questions fan had was about Szechuan Sauce.

To promote the release of the movie Mulan, Mcdonald’s had a promotional teriyaki sauce called Szechuan Sauce. Rick, while trapped in a simulator went back in time in his memories to get another taste of the delicious sauce. At the end of the episode, Rick reveals that his whole mission was to get more Szechuan Sauce! Could it be that the whole time we followed Rick through all his adventures, his main goal was to get some discontinued mcnugget sauce?

 

“So now you know the REAL reason I rescued you . . . A-and I-I’ll go out and find some more of that Mulan, Szechuan Teriyaki dipping sauce, Morty. ‘Wh-what are you talking about?’ Because that’s, that’s what this is all about Morty! ‘Szechuan?’ Th-that’s my one arm man. I’m not driven by avenging my dead family *Morty crawls away* Morty, that was FAKE! -and Morty gets pulled back. I-I’m driven by finding that, McNugget Sauce. Nuggets? I want that Mulan McNugget Sauce, Morty. Mulan? That’s my series arc Morty! What the Hell? If it takes 9 seasons, I WANT MY MCNUGGET DIPPING, What’re you talking about Rick? SAUCE SZECHUAN SAUCE MORTY! What’re you talking about? TH-THAT’S WHAT’S GONNA TAKE US, ALL THE WAY TO THE END MORTY! SEASON, 9 MORE SEASONS MORTY! Szechuan sauce?! 9 MORE SEASONS UNTIL I GET THAT DIPPING SZECHUAN SAUCE! What is that?! FOR 97 MORE YEARS MORTY! What are you talking about?! I WANT THAT MCNUGGET SAUCE MORTY!!!”

-Rick Sanchez Season 3 Episode 1 Credit to SharkStuff54321

Now With The High Demand For Szechuan Sauce, Everyone Is Wondering If McDonald’s Will Bring It Back. Fans Deserve To Know!

 

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Mike Tyson Mysteries The Best Animated TV Show Of All Time

Mike Tyson Mysteries The Best Adult Cartoon

Mike Tyson former professional boxer was once the world’s heavyweight champion. Now Tyson has become the leader of the world’s greatest detective team. The Mike Tyson Mystery Team is made up of a few excellent mystery solvers that rival and tower those such as Scooby Doo’s Gang.   Marquess of Queensberry is a homosexual ghost. Mike’s adopted daughter Yung Hee is a tech genius. Pigeon who was once a man is, you guessed it! He is a pigeon. Together, they are the Mike Tyson Mystery Team!

Adult Swim has a unique lineup of cartoons and shows. Mike Tyson Mysteries is a brilliant blend of the classic Hanna Barbera cartoons and the zany characterized champion Mike freakin’ Tyson. 

Part of the show’s charm is brought to life by the voice actors. Tyson of course voices himself perfectly. His lines feel genuine and almost improvised. Norm Macdonald captures Pigeon’s lazy a-hole personality perfectly.  Rachel Ramras plays Tyson’s daughter Yung Hee very well, keeping the others grounded. Jim Rash balances Marquess’ flamboyance and cockiness very well.

the gang
the gang

Were you a fan of Saturday morning cartoons growing up? Eating your cereal watching looney toons or the Mr. T Show? Do you enjoy shows like Rick and Morty or Scooby Doo? Well then it would behoove you to give Mike Tyson Mysteries a watch. The witty writing blends Tyson’s past incidents into the show as little quips and easter eggs. Mike Tyson Mysteries is jam packed with tons of sci fi, fantasy, mystery, and adventure! The show is full of clever twists and bizarre encountering. Mike Tyson is back in action and better than ever.

 

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Trump Appoints Dancing Hot Dog The New President Of The United States!!!

Trump & Hot Dog

Dancing Hot Dog Elected New President

As of the last 23.56 hours President Donald Trump has made the bigliest decision of his

Trump
Trump

presidency! Trump has appointed a dancing hot dog as the new president of the United States. Now you may wonder, who in their right mind would make a hot dog the new leader of the American people? The answer is Donald. Donald Duck. Now before we investigate we must ask a more pressing question? Who is this hot dog?

The Dancing Hot Dog is a living meme, much like Trump in some ways. The Dancing Hot Dog is best known as a filter from the ever so popular platform Snapchat. The beloved hot dog has be widely received only positive reception with little to no haters.

Hot Dog and DJ Khaled
Hot Dog and DJ Khaled

Before the Dancing Hot Dog, Snapchat was ruled by someone else. DJ Khaled aka Khaled Mohamed Khaled. DJ Khaled is a mogul and unofficially the most influential person in all of existence. Until now!!!

DJ Khaled Has Approved Dancing Hot Dog And Is Looking Forward To His Presidency.

Barack Hussein Obama II, the 44th President of the United States had nothing to say. Most speculate that Mr. Obama has the deepest respect for the Dancing Hot Dog. Mr. Obama even went as far as to inviting the Dancing Hot Dog to dinner with his wife Michelle.

Another politician, best known for being sort of friends with Bill Clinton, Ms. Hillary Clinton had another thing to say. She responded to the new situation through an angry tweet. “Twitter is clearly not her territory” said Mr. Trump in regard to Hillary’s failed attempt at a tweet. She

Hillary's Attack on President Dancing Hot Dog
Hillary’s Attack on President Dancing Hot Dog

received a whopping negative 754 million hearts and counting. Which is unheard of! Twitter did not even have the option to rate a negative heart. While Hillary is blaming Russian hackers, the new President, Dancing Hot Dog had something brilliant prepared in response. Instead of trying to apologize President Hot Dog had a better idea. President Hot Dog gave the most moving inspirational expressive dance routine the world has ever seen. Then Hillary broke down in tears of joy and gave the Dancing Hot Dog a hug. Secret service moved fast, assuming she was attempting to attack the President, and she has never been heard of ever since.

The Donald and The Dog
The Donald and The Dog

Since the Dancing Hot Dog has become president, he has become much more active on the twitter community and dropped the snapchat scene altogether. What will President Dancing Hot Dog do next? Mr. Trump gave President Dancing Hot Dog all his nuclear codes but seems to have no need for them anyway. President Dancing Hot Dog’s next move is still a mystery!

 

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Spider-Man Homecoming an Amazing Movie Review

Spider-Man: Homecoming

Grab Your Popcorn and Get Ready to be Amazed by Spider-Man: Homecoming!

Spider-Man Homecoming
Spidey Chilling

Homecoming is a charming movie with genuine storytelling. Tom Holland plays the most relatable and lovable Peter Parker yet. Remember Andrew Garfield’s edgy hipster reimagining Peter Parker or Tobey Maguire? Yeah well forget about them! Holland brings Peter Parker back to his iconic mannerism. The awkward teenage genius, that balances his crime fighting and his school work. On top of all that work, Peter faces another super obstacle! His high school social life.

If being a superhero isn’t hard enough, Peter has to deal with his social life in the most awkward part of his life. Peter’s social life is a familiar one to many high schoolers (excluding the whole saving the world part).  Peter gets through school and puts up with the the infamous bully Flash. Although for the most part, Peter spends most of his time hanging out with Ned, who share the similar interest in real life superheroes, tech, science and their high school crushes.

Jacob Batalon (left) and Tom Holland in Columbia Pictures’ SPIDER-MAN™: HOMECOMING.

Peter’s best bud Ned, played by Jacob Batalon, is a lovable geek. Ned teleports ultimate spidey fans from their seats straight into the movie. Ned shares the same excitement with the fanboys and moviegoers alike!

‘Spider-Man: Homecoming’ is the newest and greatest addition to the MCU (Marvel Cinematic Universe). Anyone that has kept up with most Marvel movies will have a deeper appreciation for the movie. The movie draws parts from ‘The Avengers’ and ‘Captain America: Civil War’ seamlessly reinforcing and strengthening a constantly flourishing world. However, anyone can still easily pick up on the story and enjoy the movie without previously seeing a single superhero movie.

Spider-Man Homecoming
Spider-Man Webbing Guys Up

To avoid any major spoilers I will keep the next points brief. Michael Keaton’s role as the Vulture is well developed. Robert Downey Jr. fans and Iron Man fans alike will enjoy the Tony Stark’s scenes. Tony’s appearances serve much more to the story than an entertaining Stan Lee cameo but still gives plenty of room for Spider-Man to find himself on his personal journey.

 

‘Spider-Man: Homecoming’ Is An Amazing Movie And A Must See! If You Weren’t A Spidey Fan Already You Will Be!

 

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Logan Paul and Jake Paul The Kings of Youtube!?

Jake Paul Vine Star Turned Youtube God?

Jake Paul and his brother Logan Paul
Paul Bros

Jake Paul is a mighty youtube ruler, but how?? Many years ago, there was once an app. An app that captured the pure essence of humor and cringe. All within 7 seconds! Now back then there were a few Gods and Goddesses to rule the Vine Empire. Among them was Nash Grier. Hey do you remember that guy? Nash Grier? The guy with crystal blue eyes, that made every girl fall under his spell? Nash was once the most influential Viners ever. Then people like Amanda Cerny, Kingbach, Logan Paul began to take over the scene.

Jake Paul Dancing
Jake Paul Dancing

Now where does Jake Freakin Paul fit in!?!?

After Logan grew a community of loyal followers, he introduced his brother Jake to the scene. As such Logan Paul’s followers worshiped him and his younger brother equally. Tuning into each 7 second clip to like and share to millions more!

However a dark day was approaching. The end of days. At least in regards to Vine! When Vine shut down what happened to the great Paul Brothers? Well Logan Paul had a brilliant idea– youtube! Logan decided it was best to rule the youtube platform and with his millions of fans backing him up, he soon had power. With this new form of power, Logan Paul created his army which he calls  THE LOGANG!

Logan Paul
Logan Paul

Now Jake Paul took the same approach. He began to make his way into the daily blogs. His millions of fans also followed. Now you would think the two would unite? Join forces?

This is when Jake decided he was better, stronger, superior!!!

So with his far superior intellect and perfect IQ of 100, he set off to create his own army. One that would destroy THE LOGANG!

Jake Paul and his doggie
Jake Paul and his doggie

Jake wanted to show how amazing and clever he was! As such he created “THE JAKE PAULERS.” That’s right! He added an “er” to the end of his name. This historical analysis is credited to Ethan and Hila Klein. Ethan and Hila are trusted youtube historians and the brilliant creators of H3H3 Productions. They both have done extensive research on Logan Paul and Jake Paul. They recently investigated Jake Paul’s new Music Video and do an excellent job explaining the nature of them.

 

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The Soy Milk Crisis Results in Violent Milk Riots!

Riots in the streets as angry milk farmers are fed up with milking their cows.

Angry Milk Riot
Angry Milk Riot

This is the second instance when a cop has been hosed down with 743 gallons of old milk. Officer Kyle Brown was the chief of police back in 1955. Officer Brown was the top in his region and specialized in animal crimes. However, Officer Brown had an ongoing feud with a questionable fellow named Arnold McDonald. Mr McDonald had a farm, a farm that grew a very suspicious plant.

Now, this plant was not your run of the mill kale. No, not at all. Mr. McDonald grew something far more deceiving and possibly malicious. Old, McDonald grew soy!

Nowadays, soybeans are nothing to get upset about. However, back in the day it was frowned upon. But Back when ol’ Brown was in town, well let’s just say that was another story.

After 11 years of cat and mouse, Brown and McDonald were getting too old for this. They decided to make a truce that would declare that soy would never be used as a substitute to milk. At first this seemed reasonable to both men. However, this was not the case for long.

Arnold Mcdonald
Arnold McDonald

Arnold McDonald had the milk fever. He drank milk too much. He drank cold milk. he drank hot milk. He drank chocolate milk. He drank blue milk. Mr. McDonald drank so much milk, he could not dare drink another drop.

McDonald was craving milk. But when he wads diagnosed with asomatheingotmilk-itis he knew that one drop would would send him into a six year coma or endless diarrhea. Either consequence was not worth the sweet sensation Arnold McDonald.

Arnold did not have the resources to scientifically engineer such a genius and clever MILK alternative.

Arnold McDonald did not have the resources to scientifically engineer such a genius and clever concoction. So he reached out to other milk farmers who also were interested in creating a “soy milk.” After gathering a group of farmers, McDonald told them his story. The farmers were so moved they decided to take matters into their own hands. Then the riots began, police and farmers at each others neck—all because of the milk.

 

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This Is Why The Fidget Spinner Toy Trend Is Going To Die!

Manufactured primarily in foreign countries, these trendy fidget toys are infused with a chemical only used in military products created for chemical warfare.

Fidget Spinner Hand Spinner toy
Fidget Spinner

The biggest trend since bell bottom jeans, fidget toys have taken America by surprise. Go outside and you will most likely see a fidget toy within an average radius of 27 feet. While most people believe it to be a harmless children toy, the reality is devastatingly more sinister. Manufactured primarily in foreign countries, these trendy toys are infused with a chemical only used in military products created for chemical warfare.

At first it was the fidget cube, one of the most popular Kickstarter projects of all time. The demand for these toys created a perfect opportunity for malicious terrorists to manufacture the most devious weapon since the 12.99 McDonald’s Happy Meal Toy the Nerf Flamethrower with fun grenade launching action.

This was not the first attempt to take down America from the inside. Back in 2006 the Oozinator was sold as one of the members of Hasbro’s super soakers. However what made the Oozinator different from other super soakers on the market was that is was filled with slime. Each Oozinator contained 10-ounce supply of “bio-ooze.” The main ingredient of bio-ooze? Unknown!

A Photo of an Oozinator Blaster
Oozinator

Parents were not happy seeing their children drench each other in an unknown substance and was shortly after discontinued.

What happened to all that bio-ooze you may ask? Well to answer this question we must turn to one man, Supreme Leader of North Korea, and fidget spinner enthusiast, Kim Jong Un.

“Fidget spinning is my third favorite activity next to eating and making love to my beautiful friend Hay Hay.” Un said on a FaceTime interview with CNN earlier this year.

Although Kim spends most of his time plotting world domination, he enjoys taking some time to relax. “Fidget spinning is my third favorite activity next to eating and making love to my beautiful friend Hay Hay.” Un said on a FaceTime interview with CNN earlier this year. Hay Hay, is Kim’s lover and pet goat.

Kim and his goat
Kim and his Lover Hay Hay

Unlike Kim’s personal fidget tri-spinner, which is a custom 24 karat sculpt with diamonds, the millions that Kim’s factuality produced is sculpted with the infamous bio-ooze. The same ooze that was banned from sale in early 2007. Although nobody has identified the RNA within bio-ooze, Kim is known to be a big advocate for recycling. Could Kim just be capitalizing on a trend and protecting the planet? Is this part of Kim’s plan of world domination? Or is he trying to keep up with a dying trend?

 

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The Dog Food Industry Does Not Want You To Know This!

The Dog Food Industry is all about money. Mr. Catfish Cooley investigates the situation further by conducting a science experiment to uncover the mystery.

Most dog lovers admit they splurge a bit when it comes to feeding their fuzzy little friends. They are under the impression that buying their dogs more expensive brand name food will keep them happier and healthier. While most Petco employees agree that you get what you pay for one man strongly disagrees!

Dog eating
Dog Enjoying His Food?

The dog food industry may seem innocent at first examination. However on further investigation dark secrets began to pop up. Renown Scientist and Professor at free_diplomaz@yahoo.com, Catfish Cooley believes the corporate media has been feeding your dogs the same garbage with an astronomical inflation in price. “Brainwashing consumers with fancy pictures and words” stated Cooley in a private meeting with science enthusiast and professional mystery solver, Mr. Fred Jones. “The gang and I have always stuck with Scooby Snacks. But to be honest, our dog Scoob has an endless appetite he hardly eats dog food! He mostly inhales hamburgers, pizza pies, human remains, cookies, forensic evidence, and the entire menu at Popeyes.”   

Scooby Doo and Shag eating snacks
Scoob Munching on Some Pancakes.

To settle the debate Catfish Cooley took it upon himself to conduct an experiment at home. He chose to sample one can of cheap dog food and one can of the expensive kind. When Cooley opens the first can of “Mighty Dog Food” he begins to gag. He then samples the food but was unable to swallow.

After the second and third and fourth attempt, Cooley concluded that all dog food is shit! If you want to treat your dog right, then go to your local supermarket and buy them a turkey sandwich and a stack of pancakes.

 

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I Showed Up to the First Day of my Summer Internship, and it Turns Out my Mom Catfished the Shit Out of Me.

First Day at my Summer Internship

Summer internships have become an important part of resume-building in the modern business world. Newly-minted graduates entering the job market are expected to have at least one, but preferably two or three internships in the field they are applying to. Given the burgeoning importance of internships in the job application process, it hurts even more that when I showed up to the first day of my summer internship I quickly found out that my mom had catfished the shit out of me.

lindsey lohan
Paris Hilton, My Favorite Musician

My dream internship was to work for my favorite musician, Paris Hilton. Paris Hilton is my favorite recording artist, a fact which made it all the more exciting when I saw her post on several job sites looking for a personal assistant. I thought it was kind of strange when she hired me without an interview and then told me to meet me at my mom’s house for my first day of work, but I have always been a trusting person (ask my friends if you don’t believe me). In retrospect, the fact that Paris Hilton would need me to do work in and around my mother’s home does strike me as a red flag.

When I showed up to what I thought was my first day of work, I was very excited to meet Mrs. Paris. She produced my favorite single “Star Are Blind” which I recently found out many people do not include in their top 10 songs of all time lists. I went inside to meet my idol, and was disappointed when I saw my mother. I have never watched the famous MTV drama “Catfished” but at that moment I knew exactly what it felt like to be truly fished by a cat. I have never been fishing but would like to.

young boy fishing
What I imagine it would look like if I ever went fishing

It only makes things worse that my uncle and his wife also attended the catfishing, along with my great-uncle who I had not seen in years due to his illness. He was sick for a while and we were unsure whether he would pull through so I felt kind of guilty as soon as I saw him, but he was very understanding and as compassionate as ever. We had a great conversation about what each of us has been up to for the past couple years. While it was nice to catch up with family, I do wish that I could have helped Paris Hilton record her next hit single.

If you are reading this, Ms. Paris, I’m rooting for you!

 

 

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